/j yun

The Wives

“The wolves wore woman faces. I was always afraid. My father was textile rich with many wives. My mother, the youngest of them, the only one God sent a son through. I was the prize mother’s cheek was ground on washboards for, pulped mess I bloodied my mouth on to prove she was loved. The wives descended at night with all their teeth. I hid behind the paper screen, watched shadows beat shadow in the lamplight’s flex & release. Then the animal shit left at our door before dawn. Then the suppers laced with wisteria which we ate & heaved like dogs. I dreamt of leaving and I left. The impossible milk of morning made me run away. I kicked dust in the streets as kids cupped their hands in hunger, struggled with the weight of my tongue, dodged Japanese night patrol until I couldn’t. I was brought back cut & gaunt. No son of mine would bring me this shame. Both the bitch & the whelp have rotted. Fallen from favor, mother held to father’s knees saying ‘we will not go, we will not go.’ For what did we know of hunger? The wolves smothered their laughs, gathered around in their gowns of dyed silk. The night sky we stood under pulsed like something hurting.”

 

Caught

 

a girl mired in a net

 

between her legs a quiver

 

of taking she wants to untangle

 

her limbs split the fishhook

 

from the soft meat of her mouth

 

skeleton flower

 

pale vein

 

when wet she is briefly vanished

 

but that girl was me

 

nineteen your red sheets redder

 

where whetted

 

with whiskey

 

what to do with this memory?

 

worked open

 

silt in my gills trout mouth puckered and shut

 

the lazy turns of the ceiling fan

 

a thread of moonlight sang opal

 

in your one white hair I was frenzied by the moon

 

what a good girl

he must have loved having you

Just like this

 

outside the olive trees quivered overtaken by fruit

 

my girl is frigid but you—

 

If wet was I

 

complicit?

 

dear poison

 

dear quiver of unmaking

 

if I drank what you offered

 

if I let you hook your thumb against my lip

 

if my memory of that night flexes image like a convex mirror

 

then is memory wrong when it says I said no

 

only once?

 

some hours you were slow hands

 

Other-times animal and ravenous

 

my legs caught in your sheets

 

like refusal

 

rain-wet pavement walking home

 

some nights I dream of only water

 


Jihyun Yun is a Korean-American poet currently residing in Busan. A Fulbright Fellow and Pushcart Prize nominee, her poetry can be found or is forthcoming in Narrative, Fugue, River Styx, and elsewhere.